Last week, on his way to a party hosted by The Paris Review, Jeffrey Eugenides, was jacked in the face by a couple of intoxicated frat stars, who were apparently singing a song (very loudly) that they had composed in honor of their penises. The pulitzer-prize winning author of MIDDLESEX was non-plussed, until the frat stars started harrassing a woman on the train, at which point the middle-aged, chivalrous author of THE VIRGIN SUICIDES attempted to intervene, thereby warranting the wrath of the intoxicated chanteurs.

Jeffrey Eugenides. b. 1960.

All in all, this is pretty bad ass. Say you’re Jeff Eugenides. Sure, your first book was turned into an amazing movie starring Kirsten Dunst. Your second book wins the Pulitzer, and now your third novel is almost coming out and — wham — you get this awesome publicity! Well, kind of awesome. It would have been awesomer if Jeff had given the black-eye to the intoxicated would-be sexual harrasser / former fraternity men, but receiving a shiner after telling a few probably enormous steroid-taking assholes is just as good! Supposedly, Jeff showed up at the Paris Review party with stitches and a black-eye, i.e. looking like a total bad ass

Here’s the Village Voice link. Here’s the NY Post link. And here’s what Kirsten Dunst looked like back when she was Lux Lisbon in THE VIRGIN SUICIDES:

Lux Lisbon, who used to write her boyfriend's name in her underwear